What's That Now?

There's a funny piece in Consumer Reports about warning labels that get lost in translation and end up making no sense once they're imported here from factories in China and elsewhere. My favorites: directions on a flashlight to "place the hand ring with finger and add speed uninterruptedly so as to reach the use effect" and the jelly jar that says "people under 3 years old and more than 60 years old are forbidden to eat alone."